Saturday, February 15, 2003

So Matt J, a friend of his I don't know, and I are all going for a day of snowboarding. De-lite-full.

I must say I need a bit of a break, though my intern wife wins in that catehgory, its been 2 weeks of 80+ hours a piece, and no end in sight. Well, actually April is the end in sight, but its awfully hazy at the moment. Haven't even read a page of a book, or turned on my PS2 in weeks, in spite of acquiiring new and interesting volumes and games. ho hum, even as I write this, my other computer beside me is chewing through some code gen and compilation for work, perhaps I should give it some more attention.

Got a b-day present of Mr.Show DVDs from my bro. As a non-HBO watcher, this is but one of the delights I apparently have missed. Perhaps when I retire it'll fill some time to catch up on the Sopranos, 6 feet under, and sex and the city.

On another note, very interesting article about Prof. Peter Singer and more importantly one of his critics is to be found in the NY Times magazine. I don't like Singer answers, I respect his approach, but mostly I am disturbed that I battle with liking the purity of his views, but also disliking that he cannot see the damage that their acceptance could cause in our obviously impure world. Similar to my stance on the death penalty - its a weaker argument against the death penalty when its proponants start with "Assume you know without a doubt the person is guilty..." - which is fine for logical debate, but a poor assumption when translating your conclusions to policy.
Anyway, judge for yourself.

Monday, February 03, 2003

TISD closed

I remember one rare Texas winter when it looked like we would have actual snow. This happened once every few winters, but only rarely enough to cause a "snow day". It only took a bit of snow to cause a panic, I wasn't asking for much. So I remember one fine pre-dawn in the first week of February, waiting by the radio praying to hear school was closed on my birthday. It was a natural - 1st week of Feb is always a misery. My parents even tell me my dad had to shovel the driveway so he could get the car out to drive my mom to the hospital the day I was born. Surely if anyone could get a TX style "white" birthday, it was me. Inevitabily though, in all my 13 years of public school in Texas, it never happened.

Why do I mention (at length) this small, selfish, and childish desire long left unsatisfied and half-forgotten? My b-day is this week, and the entire Tyler Independent School District is closed ... so they can search for toxic debris from the Columbia craft and crew. Damn. Be careful what you wish for: even years later I feel guilty, and I imagine this day off will be a guilty pleasure. A bitter holiday for the kids of East TX, and an impromptu memorial day for fallen heroes.

Anyway, I'm starting to wax all sentimental and crap. National distasters do that to me I guess. I'll stop.

My bro passed on the following apropos stanza:

Out ride the sons of Terra,
Far drives the thundering jet,
Up leaps a race of Earthmen,
Out, far, and onward yet ---

We pray for one last landing
On the globe that gave us birth;
Let us rest our eyes on the friendly skies
And the cool, green hills of Earth.

-- Robert A. Heinlein

Sunday, February 02, 2003

new (to me) feature

just added the shout outs so folks can comment on posts.
cool.
stolen from matt jans' site.
enjoy.
Tyler, Texas 75703

Perhaps the best thing I ever did is leave my hometown.

Now, a few months ago if you were not familiar with this fine town in East Texas, I would not be shocked. Waco people know. Dallas people think they know. But Tyler?

Then a few weeks ago came the NYTimes front-page series on the iron and steel plant in Tyler, and how callous, greedy and dehumanizing are its practices. For the record, I worked in the Tyler Pipe factory a few days, and I could not believe people worked there any longer than that. And I only worked a few night shifts - and not at all the hardest of the work there. Probably its just another sign of how soft my life has been, but while I was somewhat aghast the people around me seemed pleased pink to be working there - probably because they had no other choice for beating a MickeyD's salary.

Now here comes the Columbia disaster. Look, the commentary has hit the points that first come to my mind as well as yours. It is terrible, and worse that we are desensitized to the dangers of space travel so only disasters transgress into our TV and radio habits. But the personal point I have to make here is that once again the NYTimes had footage from Tyler - this time the debris streaked skies above. And there in the news I see the names of towns and counties I last saw when I would travel by school bus between them for high school debate and academic decathalon competitions. Rusk is not a town that ever makes the news, even in Texas. I mean, they aren't even that good at football. Now there are some faux non-accented american english newscasters on CNN trying to pronounce Palestine as if they were natives. Kinda like the old jokes about the rampant overly 'correct' accents used for all non-english names by the same news readers - except now they are trying to talk like the 60-year-old retired patroleom workers from Green Acres Baptist Church.

It is shocking to see such disasters, but uncanny to see such things against the backdrop of my childhood and adolescence. It's as if they happened in neverland or epcot - don't these places only exist in the recesses of my memory? How did they end up on the front-page and Dan Rather's lips? Such is the power of disaster - space travel is interesting again, and Rusk is famous.

-A
Homework again.

So I made it to my first class (5 minutes late, but that is what work and a med emergency on the T will do for ya).

The professor (freedman) is fine; knows his stuff, seems to care, and teaches the same class during the day - so it is not some night school hack pressed into service. This is a real, wizened, tenured, full professor. How do you like that?

And not to be exceedingly arrogant, but compared with the folks sitting around me I felt like I will have no trouble with this class. Now, maybe not everyone has this pathology of wondering if they are in tyhe top of their class, but old habits die hard, and being back at a 1 piece chair/desk in a drop ceiling aquare tiled classroom has me reverting not back to college, but high school attitudes.

I came in late, having missed the first class, not having done the homework (as It didn't know what it was - I had called the prof to find out what I had missed, but he had not actually told me the homework assignment). Given these relative handicaps, I still ended up picking up on what we were doing enough that by the break my neighbors were asking me for help. Granted, the young lady to my left simply needed help reading what passes for writing that our prof does no the blackboard, but still, as someone who doesn't need to write backwards to keep my notes private, I find I have an edge here. It is worth mentioning that the prof's writing is great when he writes equations and numbers, no matter the complexity or rapidity, but when he tries to write an english sentance, make sure you listen to what he is saying while he writes so you will have some crib to work from in deciphering. The fellow to my left, who noticed me on the T coming in late together from our jobs downtown, did actually comment on needing help with inductive proofs, but I am not such an egg that I offered to help, especially as the prof was doing just that 4 feet away. It's probably not fair to say that this guy noticed me on the T, really what he noticed was my new fly sony clie nx70c pda. Probably similar to the staring I did when I first saw one in person in an intern's hand. First I lusted, then I resented him affording one, then I plotted to be casually nice to him to I could play with it. Finally, to make the seperation easier, I told myself it wasn't worth it, which was convincing just long enough to get me to pay attention to something else. But I digress.

I am seriously enjoying the work. It is light, and generally interesting - discreet math is nice because everything can be related to some real life situation. I can't count the number of times I have found myself putting books in order on a shelf, or how often I have pulled colored marbles out of a bag. Course if I could count those things, I wouldn't be taking this class. But seriously, I get the relevance to programming, I am not annoyed by having to take this pre req.

One of the guys that works next to me doing GUI programming is a Math Phd. I mentioned to him one of the problems classified under 'later' by my prof when he presented it without solution. The next morning, this guy could hardly say hello before telling me the problem had bothered him so much the night before he had sat down and solved it. I guess these things become compulsive if you feed the addiction all the way to a doctorate.

On another note, I need to go snowboarding. It was too much fun last year to let work and general life eclipse such a perfect escape from this dreary season.

Perhaps it is also that my birthday is next week, and as I spent this weekend cleaning, taking out trash, washing dishes, cooking, doing homework, and watching CNN (more on that), I am feeling a bit like an adult, and I don't like it.

Maybe a freezing cold bike ride will work that out of my system. And I could pick up a few groceries.

-A

Friday, January 10, 2003

Sorry to hear about L's grandmother passing. :(

I didn't realize you were back in school! Is this your first semester? And CS is the subject? I started and second MA program last fall, and am taking 2 classes this spring *crossing my fingers*. Just slightly less applicable than yours, it's in Critical and Creative Thinking (more on my blog soon). Was thinking of doing a CS program but there are just too many pre-req's, since I don't have any formal comp training...hoping to slip a programming course or two in soon...

Later :)
So L's grandmother just died last night.

She was fairly old (90+), and had very poor eyesight, so for the first few times we met, her epithet for me was the guy in the striped shirt.

For me it is not so bad, I didn't know her long or well, but in fact I saw her more often than my own grandmother who died the summer before our wedding. I also cannot relate as much to L's grief for the same reason; my family simply isn't as close as hers. Most of my grief was regret that I knew my own grandmother so little, and failed so often to call, write, or think about her. I never visited her, even when I was old enough to do so on my own. Probably it never occurred to me since this is just not how my family operates, and I was already doing a good amount of travelling even to see my parents and brother, never mind anyone else.

The wake is Sunday, the funereal on Monday. We'll probably go see her parents this weekend then accompany them for the rest.

Perhaps I will miss my first night of class on Monday. I am sure the prof won't care.

My job was immediately sympathetic and accommodating - for some reason this still surprises me a bit when people do the right thing about such life changes.

Thursday, January 09, 2003

So class begins shortly.

The next 6 months at work are looking to be exceptionally busy/challenging, so I decided to return to academia with only one class.

I need to do a pre-req before my philosophy degree and a few CS class background can get into a CS MS program at the BU Metropolitan college. BU MET is the adult/continuing ed. college, and offers an actual MS in CS, unlike say Harvard's extension school which does not.

So it's "CS 248 - Introduction to Discrete Mathematics" every Monday from 6-9 pm for me for a while.
Joy.

Luckily it seems as though my rather, uhh, diverse academic interests have not left me completely ignorant of the subject (cs, statistics, and logic classes seem to cover alot of the syllabus). A perusal of the text makes me feel relatively confidant this will not require herculean effort.

So I snagged the text from the BU bookstore - I had to call the CS dept. to find out which text I needed since the BU bookstore has kept a monopoly on that information.

Also, since I wanted to buy the book a whole 2 weeks before classes start, the text book section of the B&N pretending to be a university bookstore was not yet open to the public - but they had a single copy of the text book in their general mathematics section, so luck day for me. Oddly, the price to buy it there was $5 cheaper than amazon or B&N, and no shipping time or cost.
Happy day.

Wednesday, June 19, 2002

Thinking about a return to school.
So one question is whether to suck it up and admit I am no real engineer and go the business/finance route.
Could be true, but I also dislike this type of work compared with the technical side of work.
So the other possibility is just to suck it up and go become the engineer I wish I already was.
That seems like a possibly frustrating path to a truer end...and a happier end as well (I hope).
But this is the essence of the problem, not the natural history. I've been kicking the tires on this idea for awhile, considering a multitude of angles, yet always come back to the same conclusion. And yet I am not moving very fast to realize it, so what is the source of the lag if I know what I ought to do? Why am I so slow to even try to get started with getting schooled again?
Time to bite the bullet and get started.

Thursday, April 11, 2002

so how about a new laptop?
how about 2?
1 from the new job, complete with port replicator (does someone own hte patent on the term docking station?)
IBM Thinkpad A21p

1 for me, myself, and I for home and family use
Dell Inspiron 8100

Sweet.
Initial impression is that I like them both, but I'll post more comments as I come to a better opinion.

Wednesday, April 10, 2002

first week at a new yab (that's bostonese for job you the uninitiated).
all strangely familar, as I got hired by a place I used to consult.
and 2 other guys from SAPE headed over here as well.
of the people I know from the last lay-off, we are the first to be placed, and the only ones I know to be placed.

in less weighty news, I have been drooling over the Treo device from Handspring (all gadgets in one, cool)
but as usual, sounds like version 1, named the 180, doesn't live up to the hope nor hype it inspired.

Wednesday, March 27, 2002

Got laid off from sapient, end of february.
Hard to feel bad about it, since it is a large group of laid off alumni I join.
Already have a new and better paying job.
Again, hard to feel bad about it.
So how should I spend my severence?

Monday, October 08, 2001

I guess the point is that too much thinking and moral system building can end up leaving out some really obvious facts, when convenient, that or this is just funny : God Angrily Clarifies 'Don't Kill' Rule

Friday, October 05, 2001

For those wondering where to invest in the middle of so much failure, turn to a specialist: Exponent

Wednesday, October 03, 2001

If you code, especially you consultants out there who inevitably have to pass their code on and disappear, then this is for you.

Tuesday, October 02, 2001

For those who have forgotten, please work on how to tread water
A nice account of the Pentagon (oh yeah, that got hit too, oh yeah people died there too) from McSweeney's : The Works of Humankind

Monday, October 01, 2001

A quick rant - lots of folks are lately writing about how human rights and such are being stomped in the quest for terrorists (perhaps crusade is a better term).
Fair enough. This is definitely happening, and shame on anyone who is invoking the current crisis in their acts of probably pre-existing prejudice.
And its also true to say that the levels of security that are being increased could be considered losses of personal freedom. Guys with machine guns may be a common place sight in other parts of the world, but not here, and arguably this is a hallmark of a move towards draconian enforcement of governmental wonts.

But does it still strike anyone else that this is also a great example of progress?

Sure, we are seeing more hate/fear towards anyone that looks like they could be arab/muslim, but when was the last time that was such outspoken response or protective media coverage? I don't see any camps being set-up, so maybe the current generation has learned from history.

Human rights are getting stomped, particularly privacy, but I see this as part of the dialogue between citizen and government that is part of a health state. Since the civil rights movement there has been popular support for more rights and protections, be it for African Americans, in what language we should use, in how all people should act in the workplace. In a crisis, we now see the popular dialogue swaying back to empowering the government - this is temporary, I really believe, as is our general shock and fear - but it is these back and forth motions of opinion that home in on a better future state, perhaps several generations from now.

So yes, please, everyone keep attuned to the disgraceful treatment of innocent people who resemble the terrorists we all fear, and fight it and speak out against it.
And likewise, make sure we don't allow our privacy to be lost to the immenent domain of new staging grounds for the war on terrorism.

But also take a step back and think what would have happened if this disaster had been perpetrated a generation ago, or two, and how we would want the next generation to react.
I guiltily enjoyed this free sample of The Cynic's Dictionary, a book I would never buy. Not nearly as clever as this could have been (not that I am volunteering to do better).

Friday, July 20, 2001

A first message - how boring